There are very few people in this world that we can honestly say we are privileged to have known well, and the funny thing is that a lot of the time, we don’t realize how fortunate we are until it’s too late, which most of the time is only during their wake or funeral.
One of those people in my life is a grand aunt, who despite never being a politician or holding public office, had one of the biggest wakes and funeral I have seen in quite some time (post COVID), which I saw was proof of a life that was a showcase of charity, generosity, and service. It ultimately made me question my own life choices, particularly on how I could make better use of my own blessings.
Ma. Cristina ‘Baby’ Unson Lacson, is a Tita-Lola who was definitely rich in spirit and in blessings. Although she lived a privileged and sheltered life, she was exceptionally devoted to helping others and serving the Church. This life of charity without ulterior motives was evident in the number of people who were at her wake and funeral, which in my humble opinion, was the type that a glory hound politico can only dream of.
As a kid, I liked going to their house because there were always lots of toys, books, and candy. Her kids, who were around my age (80s-90s kids), had the latest imported stuff like Fisher Price play sets and Archie comics. Our cousin even had an entire cabinet converted into a Barbie apartment. I remember being jealous that they got to travel to Disneyland back in the late 80s, while we couldn’t afford such vacations.
As a young adult, I saw that she and her family were very involved in the church and in civic organizations. I think it was she who convinced my mom to join her in NAMFREL during the terminal stages of the OG Marcos era. Aside from her active involvement in the church and a few foundations, her love for children in general was also evident as one of her pet projects was a preschool for the less privileged. At that age, that part of their lifestyle struck me more than the toys and Disneyland.
It was also during that life stage that I noticed that while their family lived comfortably, they most definitely weren’t the flashy type. There was no designer stuff, their cars were the most basic models. It was like their chosen luxury/vice was charity. Despite their generosity and civic mindedness, their family wasn’t the type that craved recognition, power, or influence.
One thing I admit I am not is being the charitable kind of guy, and my lame excuse had always been that I’m just surviving and don’t have a lot to give, and it’s ok because there are people who have more to give, and there are reasons why it is easy for them to be generous.
In recent years, as the age and health issues caught up with her, conversations with her daughter who I consider a close family friend, made me see that their resources weren’t infinite, and with their mounting expenses, they were also starting to struggle, already considering and resorting to selling some property. Despite that, they never stopped being generous, a quality and decision which made me question my values, because all along, I thought I had the convenient excuse of having less to give.
It turns out that some people are just more giving than others, regardless of their station in life, which if you come to think of it, is neither good nor bad, it’s just part of what makes us different.
I know it’s not my goal to have a lot of people at my wake or funeral, but it was inspiring to see how a life of charity and generosity, without any ulterior motives, was appreciated by people from all walks of life. My Tita-Lola Baby probably wasn’t thinking of that as she pursued her vocation in her 82 years of life, but she certainly helped me understand deeper the meaning of the word charity, and what kind of good can come from a well-lived life of privilege.*
