This is a transcript, at parts roughly translated, of the eulogy I gave for a legend, VISAYAN DAILY STAR editor-in-chief and president, my boss and my tita, Ninfa R. Leonardia, during her funeral mass at the Sacred Heart Shrine on August 28, 2020.
Good afternoon.
I am Carlo, a nephew and employee of Tita Ninfa.
Despite having lost my mom Meg in 2011 and papa Andy in 2013, this is my first eulogy ever. That should give you an idea how much my Tita Ninfa influenced my life and how much I admire and respect her.
In 2011, a question was asked by a famous celebrity… Who run the world?
Girls, says Beyoncé.
Is this because she was a fan of T. Ninfa?
Anyway, kidding aside, allow me to start with one of Tita’s favorite lines: Just between us girls…
I think everyone will agree with me that Tita Ninfa is the definition of the strong independent woman, even before that phrase became a fad. In fact, if you google the phrase, you are likely to see a photo of her.
However, if we also look up the word laon – you will never see her name pop up because she was the most un-laon of all the laon in the world, no offense to the loans here. Despite being a textbook laon, she was a joy to be with and spending time with her never felt like a chore. This was just one of her extraordinary qualities.
Tita Ninfa was a laon that became a family matriarch.
Matriarch. Leader. Inspiration. That was her. Think about how challenging that role is considering the strong personalities in her family. Most of you here probably know how strong the personalities of her 8 siblings are, including my father. Despite that, she took on the role of matriarch when our Lolo Joe passed on early in 1979 and our Lola Ester’s health deteriorated in the 90s.
Tita Ninfa was a big part of the family. She was the glue that held the families of her siblings together, including her family at the Visayan Daily Star, which took up a big chunk of her life. She loved her family and we loved her back. Isn’t that why we are here to say goodbye to her one last time?
She was a mother hen, a firm and very nurturing mentor who led by example, not just empty words.
She was a giver, constantly giving to her family, her vocation, and serving her community.
Despite being given a lot of gifts and attention due to her stature in society, she never ever became a taker. She never took or asked for anything.
My most recent memory of her as a giver when she her health was already failing these past few years but every time I visited her, she still made sure I don’t go home empty handed. She would have me raid her ref or table and find something to bring home, never taking no for an answer. There was a point that I would pretend that I was taking whatever she offered, whether it be a piece of fruit or a half-opened pack of goodies, but would secretly give it back to her caregiver on my way out, just to satisfy her generosity and concern. And if you come to think of it, for most of us, even if she didn’t give things, she was always giving lessons, stories, or the gift of her companionship whenever we spent time with her.
Another thing about Tita Ninfa was that she was always there. She and her partner in crime, Tita Perla, were always there for every occasion, good times or bad. As far as I can remember, it feels like they were always there at the hospital when all of the kids of my generation, her grandnephews and grandnieces, were born. If anyone got sick and had to be hospitalized, the would magically show up. If someone died, they would be at the wake. KBL (Kasal, Bunyag, Lubung) and everything in between, from birthday celebrations, anniversaries, house warming, recitals, they were always there, showing up like fairy godmothers. And their genuine love and concern meant they were never unwelcome.
On the topic of always being welcome, Tita Ninfa was a social animal, always attending events, seemingly eating dinner at a different party every night, but the interesting was that she was never a social climber. She was always invited and welcome, and despite her stature, never hogged the spotlight, content with gracing the occasion with her presence. I can imagine that the past 2 years of isolation must’ve been tough for her, but being the consummate giver that she is, she never complained.
The one thing I admire most about her was how diplomatic she is with her words and actions. It never felt like she was mad or picked a fight, even if knowing that in her line of work, she must’ve stood up for herself and her newspaper, against so many powerful, petty and influential personalities, without losing her cool and keeping everyone’s respect. This is something that cannot be taught in school or a Ted Talk, and it is so difficult to learn, even from someone who has been observing someone like her who is always teaching and mentoring in her own special way.
She was blessed with good health and graceful aging. She remained productive for her entire life, going to work every day while her body allowed, while at the same time maintaining a healthy appetite for life and good food. She was truly blessed and was a blessing to us all.
The world is now emptier without her. There will never be another one like her, who effortlessly touched so many lives and made the kind of impact she did on her community.
I am thankful to have felt the love of this extraordinary woman that we are bidding farewell today. I hope everyone here feels the same way.
Thank you. Please join me in giving her one more standing ovation.*
